Well you know how i called Derby a shithole? i take it back! this is something extraordinary. I would love to say things like this happen in Derby everyday, but quite frankly, they don't. we pretend to be something we're not half the time. We have a gigantic wheel in the square to make us look as though we're interesting but we really aren't.

I wish that for a week, no, a month. we could be like a capital. London, Paris, Berlin or Oslo. Somewhere with a bit of depth, prosperity, anguish, excitement! SOMETHING to stop my soulful self from thinking i need to find myself because i'm always mind numbingly bored. i should learn to play guitar again yes, i should tidy my room and keep it that way yes, i should do yogaeveryday to tone my body yes but why SHOULD i have to stay in this hell hole with no entertainment, no thrive, nothing what-so-ever to motivate me. 

i feel like i'm a brick in the middle of a desert. 

something that's not meant to be there. with no purpose of its surroundings and yet to find it's true purpose in the correct atmosphere. 

i will get out of Derby one day. 

One Day.