remember when i said there was no worse feeling than being rejected from the grammar school. well now there is. three/four weeks after breaking up with JD and my hearts nowhere to be found. i feel like tomorrow's just another day, not like before when i had the optimism of nothing could go wrong because things are perfect. not anymore. the one person in my life that cheered me up by being there not only as a friend but as my boyf too is gone. and now i can't get him back. its over and it feels as though i've woken up in a bad dream and i can't get out.
everyday i wake up and wonder why such a great and strong relationship ended in such a short time. its heartbreaking and its happeneing to me.
all my friends are here supporting me but i fear that only the person that i thought i knew is the one to break this misery not by asking me back or anything but by just me and him talking possibly. recently it doesn't even feel like a friendship anymore. it feels as though he doesn't care and wants nothing to do with me, because lets face it why else did he break up with me?
it hurts because i dont know how he feels about any of this, we dont talk anymore. and he said we'd be friends. i feel like we're enemies.
nothing can begin to explain my sorrow. its only hit me this past week how much i miss him and wish he was still there for me and that none of this happened. i still dont udnerstand why it happened he didn't give me any reason for the breakup.
but yeah im thanking my friends now for looking out for me. and for wanting me to be happy. tbh i just want to be the person i was when i was with JD
Ciao xoxo
