Well you know how i called Derby a shithole? i take it back! this is something extraordinary. I would love to say things like this happen in Derby everyday, but quite frankly, they don't. we pretend to be something we're not half the time. We have a gigantic wheel in the square to make us look as though we're interesting but we really aren't.

I wish that for a week, no, a month. we could be like a capital. London, Paris, Berlin or Oslo. Somewhere with a bit of depth, prosperity, anguish, excitement! SOMETHING to stop my soulful self from thinking i need to find myself because i'm always mind numbingly bored. i should learn to play guitar again yes, i should tidy my room and keep it that way yes, i should do yogaeveryday to tone my body yes but why SHOULD i have to stay in this hell hole with no entertainment, no thrive, nothing what-so-ever to motivate me. 

i feel like i'm a brick in the middle of a desert. 

something that's not meant to be there. with no purpose of its surroundings and yet to find it's true purpose in the correct atmosphere. 

i will get out of Derby one day. 

One Day.

This shithole i call home.

why would your mum call a house this... oh yeah i have a strange family and i'm the only sane one.

if theres one thing i loath in this world more than needles and Shane. is my mum. you are literally the epitome of all evil.

Succession...


If it means alot to you - A Day To Remember


Always Attract - You Me At Six


Remembering Sunday - All Time Low

CREEPY CREEPY GUY.

beware of this guy. he's a freak. wont leave you alone. wont stop adding me. and is just plain weird.


kthanksbye

i'm sorry

"I want us to live seperate lives. i can't deal with the distance."

Ok so insanity has taken hold of me once again, i'm a little needy, little annoying, lisp speaking crazy girl whom of which, when bored rights the most ridiculous things ever. 
I talked to you-know-who again. he asked me to go visit him at the hospital. and for once, when my heart raced...i didn't go. i didn't flee from where i was, i never made up some stupid excuse to leave my mates house just so i wouldn't fall out with them, i didn't go.
in a way i'm proud but there's this overwhelming feeling inside of me telling me that i should've. but i know by now it's the love and care i still feel for him. 
Anyhow,, for the past two weeks I've met some pretty funny people, all down to Rosa's new love. i must say it came at a surprise that she'd fall this quickly but he wouldn't stop pestering her/Stalking her... oh dear. but i must say out of their relationship i've met wonderful funny and entertaining people! :) besides the odd hick-up here and there lifes on its way to being great again. 




Ciao. xoxo

Today, Tomorrow, The Day After.

I can't help but notice i'm like meh this morning and i shouldn't be! James is coming. and I've been looking forward to it for such a long time. I think i'll feel better once he's here.
Even though my hearts not in it, i'm excited he's coming. 
should be good to have a new face here with me. 
oh and i bought a new camera! :) so happy about that.