This may take a while but i'm going to do it because i might like the outcome.
yesterday i was told several things by the guy/man/boy that i love.
things that i knew would crush me but i think i know how to deal with it now.
but i know what i've done wrong too. i've cheated and lied to him. and obviously,
now that i'm loosing him, i regret it. he told me yesterday he liked someone else. i nearly collapsed.
i don't think i could take the pain. This next week will be hell for me trying to mend bridges and fix
holes. but it has to be done. all i want is to be a better person right now, not only for myself but for
others sake too.
if i actually want to be successful at teenage life and not fuck it up more than i have done in the past months or my 17th/16th years. i will change for my well being, for chris, to prove to everyone i'm not who they think i am and to prove i will no longer be the old me.
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