right well this blog post is dedicated to the one and only JD. my boyfriend.
well what can i say, you're amazing. you make me smaile everytime i see i have a text from you. that time when we'd only be seeing each other about a week and you called me cause you knew i was in distress about where to go with my brother on and tuesday morening.. i had no idea where i was and you calling just calmed me down and took my mind off the fact my brother was pissing me off so much. haha good times :)
then when you knew i was totally and utterlly pissed off with how C acted.. and how i fell out with rosa over it. you sent me three messages two walls posts on facebook and then a special mail message again on facebook but the secret ones.. haha (: it didn't make me any less pissed off with C but seeing someone care for me that much really hit me.
basically having you in my life is the best thing thats ever happened to me. you're amazing for being whho you are, trumpet player, drum player and even the odd piano piece on the piano downstairs. micheal buble fan i'll never forget it. and how you managed to cope with me on the ski trip i'll never know!
this post is just to say your the most awesomest, funniest, most caring guy in the world and i wouldn't have you any other way. just do the best to your ability thats all anyone can ever ask, besides. . . we're only human haha (: i know that fro a fact cause i dont at all think about eating any animals or people :P haha lol
TO EVERYONE:
no matter what people may say, we all get stressed out. no matter how hard you try to be better than what you are it will all come in time. and no matter how less time you think you have jam packing things can be hecktic i know from my experiences it will ease down eventually and time remember wasn't a god made thing. some randomer back in the pehistoric times made it all up! hehehe like the lyrics goes...
Head under water and they tell me to breathe easy for a while
the breathing gets harder even i know that.
made room for me its to soon to seee
if im happy in your hands i'm unusually hard to hold on to.
basically saying everything will get harder before it gets easier.
enough of my jibber jabbering i need to get to bed. i have a physics mock tomoro :/ mehhh...erghh....yuukkk....
nighty night all! (:
Chao xoxo
Monday, April 27, 2009
Sunday, April 26, 2009
OMG! YOU DICK!
right well recently as you've probably heard i have gotten a new bf. and C is wayy out of the picture. but recently c added my bf (JD) and said to him the very same day that he'd came round and was supposed to fuck me. then he had the nerve to call me a slag. ro said that it was because he was biting back for me not telling him about getting a bf and i guess i should've told him but hey i'm in love... (=
me and jd are amazing as ever. and i believe that this really is a guy i could be with for a rather long time. i think if anyone who knows me that reads this then they will no that i've said that so many times. but when you finish you're exams. you know you think through what you're about to say before you say it, right? (: right. and you know you see things clearer because you're wiser and feel yourself growing up, right? (: right. well thats me as well, i've finally been able to make the right decisions in this last month or so. im thinking more clearly and i'm knuckling down on school work. having a boyfriend has helped more with the support of knowing someone loves you. i've not made brash decisions like cheating (which people know i've previously done), skyved school (which i've also previously done), aand had major fights with parents and siblings which again has also happened! haha. so now i feel more complete than ever. everything is so much better now that im nearly turning 16 and i'm thinking clearer (: so here i am. a brand new me.
chao xoxo
me and jd are amazing as ever. and i believe that this really is a guy i could be with for a rather long time. i think if anyone who knows me that reads this then they will no that i've said that so many times. but when you finish you're exams. you know you think through what you're about to say before you say it, right? (: right. and you know you see things clearer because you're wiser and feel yourself growing up, right? (: right. well thats me as well, i've finally been able to make the right decisions in this last month or so. im thinking more clearly and i'm knuckling down on school work. having a boyfriend has helped more with the support of knowing someone loves you. i've not made brash decisions like cheating (which people know i've previously done), skyved school (which i've also previously done), aand had major fights with parents and siblings which again has also happened! haha. so now i feel more complete than ever. everything is so much better now that im nearly turning 16 and i'm thinking clearer (: so here i am. a brand new me.
chao xoxo
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
YouBroughtLightToTheDarkness (=
This post is dedicated to my mum (=
i know how much she looks out for me and for the past few days i've thought about writing about her and her amazing talents plus her total immense power to keep loving me after all the stupid things i tend to do.
so yes this ones for you mum <3 (: Mwah!
well my mum is pretty much all aroudn awesome in ever department. she keeps me in line (or trys) and yet i still don't tend to listen. she only treats me like an adult when i deserve it so i'm learning still! she will always have a shout at me and i'll try and beat her by shouting louder but i always fail cause i shout a load of shit out cause i dont think before i speak when i'm shouting! haha :)
i do love my mum to pieces for being there constantly and if it weren't for her ( and my father but i'm not going into detail...Yuk) i wouldn't be here. without her i'd rather go nowhere to be honest she's pretty much my everything atm i mean family wise ^-^ cause i'm not that sad =P
she keeps pushing me even though it takes to much to do and she always manages to be busy... so i really duno how she does it. i know sometimes she'll get really stressed and shout for no reason or for the wrong reason but its just what mums do :)
no matter what even though how many times i've said i hate her... i really don't. because she is the only reason i'm alive ( and the small fact i've never thought of suicide cause i aint crazy) So without you mum i'd be nowhere (8) Nowhere girl, the world is at your command (8) haha beatles classic and an amazing song both me and mum love :)
Thank you mum for always being there and don't ever leave me cause i know you'll always believe in me no matter how angry you get at me sometimes.
i love you <3
Chao xoxo
i know how much she looks out for me and for the past few days i've thought about writing about her and her amazing talents plus her total immense power to keep loving me after all the stupid things i tend to do.
so yes this ones for you mum <3 (: Mwah!
well my mum is pretty much all aroudn awesome in ever department. she keeps me in line (or trys) and yet i still don't tend to listen. she only treats me like an adult when i deserve it so i'm learning still! she will always have a shout at me and i'll try and beat her by shouting louder but i always fail cause i shout a load of shit out cause i dont think before i speak when i'm shouting! haha :)
i do love my mum to pieces for being there constantly and if it weren't for her ( and my father but i'm not going into detail...Yuk) i wouldn't be here. without her i'd rather go nowhere to be honest she's pretty much my everything atm i mean family wise ^-^ cause i'm not that sad =P
she keeps pushing me even though it takes to much to do and she always manages to be busy... so i really duno how she does it. i know sometimes she'll get really stressed and shout for no reason or for the wrong reason but its just what mums do :)
no matter what even though how many times i've said i hate her... i really don't. because she is the only reason i'm alive ( and the small fact i've never thought of suicide cause i aint crazy) So without you mum i'd be nowhere (8) Nowhere girl, the world is at your command (8) haha beatles classic and an amazing song both me and mum love :)
Thank you mum for always being there and don't ever leave me cause i know you'll always believe in me no matter how angry you get at me sometimes.
i love you <3
Chao xoxo
Thursday, April 16, 2009
[= She's Back x
Little miss British pagent queen has thrown away her skis and moved to the bermuda triangle.
-24 hours of skiing
-14 tampons
-no blog for a week
- & one flight home
the girl with a difference is back in england =D thankfully knowing now how to ski and land in a rather nice place in her life :)
Well... first on the agenda:
JD =D:
-PHWOAR!
-Georg! AKA Gorg :)
-my bf
-he is the best thing thats ever happened to me on holiday in a long time!
- i truel am in an amazing place that hopefully will last a while [= but im not gonna go over about how amazing he is (although he is to me) i dont want to jinx it. because i think it's real.
Next...
Daily insight to the activies of the skii trip:
Saturday: travelling!...boring! :( although on the plane i got to sit next to JD and on the bus to the hotel as well. major histerics with him most of the time, he's really funny and great to have a laugh with and amazing to be around with. and then on the bus going to the hotel was fun but of course my ridiculous fobia of tunnels and the dark never over came when i realised there was about seven millions tunnels to go through and i had JD right beside me to hold on to ^-^
(random bit....JD's here while im writing this) Sunday:
Right well in the morning we had to wake up at 7, (i thought this was a holiday) to get our skii's fitted & helmets & poles. Joy! =/ and then skiing for two hours inthe morning and afternoon.
i was in pain later on in the day.
Monday:
Right well again it is a ski trip so we were skiing again for four more hours and that just basically carried on through the week. but we had a scavanger hunt in the evening to find fifteen things haha we got about 12.
Tuesday:
More skiing and this is when everything basically set off with me & JD (: we spent almost every waking moment together. hugging and holding hands. (: we had an amazing night of talents.
Wednesday:
Four more hours of skiing, and I kissed JD!!! =D
in the evening we went to another hotel along the road and watched the liverpool match against chelsea... but they lost :( me & JD stayed until half time but then left cause we were both knackered so we just went to bed. in diffo rooms of course. =P
Thursday:
Four more hours of skiing, then karaoke in the evening. *YAWN*
Friday:
ok here's where it gets rather complicated so try and listen up. two hours of skiing and then in the afternoon as usual buuuuttt in the eveing we had our last little activity to attend, a disco :) we had a great time. i got one of the girls i'd only just made friends with and got her with the guy she fancied that was at the disco. he got her number and she got her first kiss ^-^ all the guys after that admirered the fact i went straight up to the guy and asked "would you dance with my freind she thinks you're really cute!?" and which he replied "Yes!" i felt almost really like a match maker as people would probably say. it felt great to know that somethings i have as talents (being able to go up to any guy and asking them for a dance or for their number) aren't actualy useless to some people. so it has its advantages which made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside ^-^. but on another note.. cause JD asked me out on wednesday and i said yes so were officially started going out then. good times. thats getting off the subject a little, oh yes at the disco i was dancing with sabrina girl two years below me and two guys came onto me while with her, first one kept looking at me and just decided to come over and dance with me put his hands on my waist and try to kiss me. the next dude was his friend and i wasn't happy so i said my boyfriends here, and he came CLOSER! he drags me upstairs to this little seating area and tried to kiss me. i told him to back off. and thankfully he did :) few. then the last dude i must say i did only ask him to dance cause he looked rather bored with his friends and he was the second best looking one of the bunch.. the first one was so much more smaller than me i couldn't dance with him. although the shortness might have been a bonus on the "him trying to kiss me" bit! haha :) the only other guy i thought looked different and stood out was this one guy i couldn't get i know i wasn't gonna try anything cause i had JD but i just sorta had an attention look from him. something made him stand out and i caught my attention i know im not gonna deny the fact of yes he was hot but there was something WAAAY more. oh well the main thing is i actually pushed all of them off, when i could've just let them kiss me (the gusy at the disco). but i didn't, i'm changing for a reason. i know why. because this is it, the one guy i know it could turn out different. or atleast thats how i feel. this one guy who i didn't think it could be possible so young has managed to pull me in without tricks or cheesy chat up lines, just a really good sense of humor and an amazing passion for music. but im getting carried away in my thoughts basically all i'm saying is that one holiday has made a huge difference on how i used to look at one person that wasn't even a best friend or a meer crush until now, he's my boyfriend and i'm proud i have him. i'm very lucky to have you JD. (= Chaoxox
-24 hours of skiing
-14 tampons
-no blog for a week
- & one flight home
the girl with a difference is back in england =D thankfully knowing now how to ski and land in a rather nice place in her life :)
Well... first on the agenda:
JD =D:
-PHWOAR!
-Georg! AKA Gorg :)
-my bf
-he is the best thing thats ever happened to me on holiday in a long time!
- i truel am in an amazing place that hopefully will last a while [= but im not gonna go over about how amazing he is (although he is to me) i dont want to jinx it. because i think it's real.
Next...
Daily insight to the activies of the skii trip:
Saturday: travelling!...boring! :( although on the plane i got to sit next to JD and on the bus to the hotel as well. major histerics with him most of the time, he's really funny and great to have a laugh with and amazing to be around with. and then on the bus going to the hotel was fun but of course my ridiculous fobia of tunnels and the dark never over came when i realised there was about seven millions tunnels to go through and i had JD right beside me to hold on to ^-^
(random bit....JD's here while im writing this) Sunday:
Right well in the morning we had to wake up at 7, (i thought this was a holiday) to get our skii's fitted & helmets & poles. Joy! =/ and then skiing for two hours inthe morning and afternoon.
i was in pain later on in the day.
Monday:
Right well again it is a ski trip so we were skiing again for four more hours and that just basically carried on through the week. but we had a scavanger hunt in the evening to find fifteen things haha we got about 12.
Tuesday:
More skiing and this is when everything basically set off with me & JD (: we spent almost every waking moment together. hugging and holding hands. (: we had an amazing night of talents.
Wednesday:
Four more hours of skiing, and I kissed JD!!! =D
in the evening we went to another hotel along the road and watched the liverpool match against chelsea... but they lost :( me & JD stayed until half time but then left cause we were both knackered so we just went to bed. in diffo rooms of course. =P
Thursday:
Four more hours of skiing, then karaoke in the evening. *YAWN*
Friday:
ok here's where it gets rather complicated so try and listen up. two hours of skiing and then in the afternoon as usual buuuuttt in the eveing we had our last little activity to attend, a disco :) we had a great time. i got one of the girls i'd only just made friends with and got her with the guy she fancied that was at the disco. he got her number and she got her first kiss ^-^ all the guys after that admirered the fact i went straight up to the guy and asked "would you dance with my freind she thinks you're really cute!?" and which he replied "Yes!" i felt almost really like a match maker as people would probably say. it felt great to know that somethings i have as talents (being able to go up to any guy and asking them for a dance or for their number) aren't actualy useless to some people. so it has its advantages which made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside ^-^. but on another note.. cause JD asked me out on wednesday and i said yes so were officially started going out then. good times. thats getting off the subject a little, oh yes at the disco i was dancing with sabrina girl two years below me and two guys came onto me while with her, first one kept looking at me and just decided to come over and dance with me put his hands on my waist and try to kiss me. the next dude was his friend and i wasn't happy so i said my boyfriends here, and he came CLOSER! he drags me upstairs to this little seating area and tried to kiss me. i told him to back off. and thankfully he did :) few. then the last dude i must say i did only ask him to dance cause he looked rather bored with his friends and he was the second best looking one of the bunch.. the first one was so much more smaller than me i couldn't dance with him. although the shortness might have been a bonus on the "him trying to kiss me" bit! haha :) the only other guy i thought looked different and stood out was this one guy i couldn't get i know i wasn't gonna try anything cause i had JD but i just sorta had an attention look from him. something made him stand out and i caught my attention i know im not gonna deny the fact of yes he was hot but there was something WAAAY more. oh well the main thing is i actually pushed all of them off, when i could've just let them kiss me (the gusy at the disco). but i didn't, i'm changing for a reason. i know why. because this is it, the one guy i know it could turn out different. or atleast thats how i feel. this one guy who i didn't think it could be possible so young has managed to pull me in without tricks or cheesy chat up lines, just a really good sense of humor and an amazing passion for music. but im getting carried away in my thoughts basically all i'm saying is that one holiday has made a huge difference on how i used to look at one person that wasn't even a best friend or a meer crush until now, he's my boyfriend and i'm proud i have him. i'm very lucky to have you JD. (= Chaoxox
Saturday, April 04, 2009
FamousLastWords =(
ok right this is gonna be well and truly my last words for the next week unless of course i get there and there's computers we're allowed on. haha :) but yes these are gonna be my final words before heading towards manchester airport at around ten o'clock from my schools docking bay (where the bus leaves from) i know i've not written this in ages but its because i've been busy!
i was at school yesterday for FOUR HOURS! why you may ask...because i had stupid composition work to do ¬_¬ not fun i'm telling you
for all the people that actually read this blog i'm sorry that i haven't written in a while.
and for all those people that just come across my blog... welcome and read my previous blogs ^-^ would be nice to have a few comment on this or other blog entries when i get back *hint hint* :)
i must say the past few days have been rather bumpy :/ considering im "seeing" C now instead of going out. i really do like him its just the question of knowing wether or not that we'll be together eventually. i know myself that we were moving too fast so i suppose i kinda knew it was coming... if you get me.
anyways last day of school was a complete dud! i fell asleep in choir...STANDING UP! i mean who does that!?!?!? i wasn't singing obviously but come on, who's ever fell asleep standing up? *raises hand* lol :d and i can honestly say when the girl next to me hick-upped in the only pause in the song i reall couldn't stop giggling! it was so funny i was laughing my head off :L
oh yeah and also about C... i was at his house ALL thursday.. magical day i must say :) met his mum which was ok. made him watch one of my ridicuous girly vid's and managed to get a few good profile pics for my webbie's :) not this one of course cause i don't want to reveal my identity :P hehe
but yeah magical it was i loved every second being there i must say but that was the last time i saw him before today's trip :( ok i now have twently mins (08:40) before i have to go so i better make the rest of this snappy!
april fools day apparently was supposed to be good for me... hmmm it turned out alright actually considering i went to Tall J's house and had a rather boring time but considering the fact that he tried to kiss me! yeah well he knew i used to like him and he's an alright looking guy but i knew it was never gonna go anywhere so i gave up on that ages ago!! so i refused :) it was funny how he covered it up though pretending he was "going in" to get something of my face :L :P hilarious! but yeah no way hojez was that gonna happen! so we ended up watching peep show for the rest of the duration i was there.
Horoscope:
ok my horoscope said about thursday was gonna be intimate X] and it was...so far so good. my horoscopes have proved me wron once again trying to doubt what comes naturally :) and what my horoscope said about last saturday was... Whaever saturn dishes up today. you'll still reach that special goal. deeply held wishes and long term hopes are highlighted and you are arriving as a place wher it takes more than other people to get in the way of your ambitions :) so yes that turned out as well. mind you i didn't quite know that saturn was my planet! haha :) you learn something new everyday. oh and another thing new friends are always so good to talk to. this guy i met not to long ago ... wait when i say met i mean started talking to, we started talking and it seemed like we'd known each otehr years for some reason but it was so easy to talk to him and he'd listen :) very nice i must say and also my downer day... yesterday this dude called andy kay very very nice :) helped me calm down (from crying) and manage to convince me that nothings worth cryin over if you're crying :) haha if that dont make sense then oh well but i know what i mean :) i can't ignore the fact i was cryin but he helped me with some psychology way of thinking :) he sent me a link to this pic of a couple standing under this tree lookin thing and he told me "look at the bigger picture" and i saw a baby formed by the tree....
oh shit i have to go (08:52) right im off now...
i'll miss you C :)
x
chao xoxo p.s will tell you veerything that happens each day MWAH!!!! xoxoxoxoxox
i was at school yesterday for FOUR HOURS! why you may ask...because i had stupid composition work to do ¬_¬ not fun i'm telling you
for all the people that actually read this blog i'm sorry that i haven't written in a while.
and for all those people that just come across my blog... welcome and read my previous blogs ^-^ would be nice to have a few comment on this or other blog entries when i get back *hint hint* :)
i must say the past few days have been rather bumpy :/ considering im "seeing" C now instead of going out. i really do like him its just the question of knowing wether or not that we'll be together eventually. i know myself that we were moving too fast so i suppose i kinda knew it was coming... if you get me.
anyways last day of school was a complete dud! i fell asleep in choir...STANDING UP! i mean who does that!?!?!? i wasn't singing obviously but come on, who's ever fell asleep standing up? *raises hand* lol :d and i can honestly say when the girl next to me hick-upped in the only pause in the song i reall couldn't stop giggling! it was so funny i was laughing my head off :L
oh yeah and also about C... i was at his house ALL thursday.. magical day i must say :) met his mum which was ok. made him watch one of my ridicuous girly vid's and managed to get a few good profile pics for my webbie's :) not this one of course cause i don't want to reveal my identity :P hehe
but yeah magical it was i loved every second being there i must say but that was the last time i saw him before today's trip :( ok i now have twently mins (08:40) before i have to go so i better make the rest of this snappy!
april fools day apparently was supposed to be good for me... hmmm it turned out alright actually considering i went to Tall J's house and had a rather boring time but considering the fact that he tried to kiss me! yeah well he knew i used to like him and he's an alright looking guy but i knew it was never gonna go anywhere so i gave up on that ages ago!! so i refused :) it was funny how he covered it up though pretending he was "going in" to get something of my face :L :P hilarious! but yeah no way hojez was that gonna happen! so we ended up watching peep show for the rest of the duration i was there.
Horoscope:
ok my horoscope said about thursday was gonna be intimate X] and it was...so far so good. my horoscopes have proved me wron once again trying to doubt what comes naturally :) and what my horoscope said about last saturday was... Whaever saturn dishes up today. you'll still reach that special goal. deeply held wishes and long term hopes are highlighted and you are arriving as a place wher it takes more than other people to get in the way of your ambitions :) so yes that turned out as well. mind you i didn't quite know that saturn was my planet! haha :) you learn something new everyday. oh and another thing new friends are always so good to talk to. this guy i met not to long ago ... wait when i say met i mean started talking to, we started talking and it seemed like we'd known each otehr years for some reason but it was so easy to talk to him and he'd listen :) very nice i must say and also my downer day... yesterday this dude called andy kay very very nice :) helped me calm down (from crying) and manage to convince me that nothings worth cryin over if you're crying :) haha if that dont make sense then oh well but i know what i mean :) i can't ignore the fact i was cryin but he helped me with some psychology way of thinking :) he sent me a link to this pic of a couple standing under this tree lookin thing and he told me "look at the bigger picture" and i saw a baby formed by the tree....
oh shit i have to go (08:52) right im off now...
i'll miss you C :)
x
chao xoxo p.s will tell you veerything that happens each day MWAH!!!! xoxoxoxoxox
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